MUSLIM MEN

Most of you will be familiar with my rants every now and then, be it in vlogs, instagram captions or a little write up, and now I’m about to embark on another little bit of controversy regarding men, right here on this page. BTW I only say ‘controversy’ because people seem to get very sensitive when you call men out, particularly Muslim men but that’s a whole other post in itself. I do understand that my work means being exposed to a massive amount of people that most are not used to as part of their daily life and of course naturally I will come across absurd comments, opinions and just strange things in general.  I get that people have a sense of entitlement to comment on my personal choices, more specifically my own personal ‘religiosity’ and pretty much anything that I am well aware I have shared online. Usually with the reasoning that I am a blogger and am therefore ‘asking for it’ or ‘if you can’t handle criticism then don’t put yourself out there.’  Basically just expecting me to accept disgusting behaviour and tolerate hate that in no other work place would anyone be expected to condone. TBH it actually doesn’t affect me at all when I do receive terribly strange comments or abuse online, I’ve grown way past that and thankfully the positive outweighs the bad immensely.. so obvs that helps.

What does grind my gears is where opinions on the way I dress can sometimes come from. For some baffling reason, a lot of the time it just so happens to come from Muslim MEN. Why? Simply why? Why do a HUGE amount of Muslim men have this sense of entitlement to share their opinion on how a woman, who bear in mind has NOTHING to do with them, dresses. Let alone females related to them? I seriously don’t understand the logic. Actually never mind the logic, how about the utter disrespect not just to the strange women that never once asked for this irrelevant mans opinion on her hijab or ‘lack of it.’ But the disrespect towards the women in their lives? Some of these guys are married, with kids. You’d think with all the responsibilities that Muslim men have when they have their OWN family that they simply would not have the time to even THINK about another woman and how ‘acceptable’ her expression in clothing is? It’s actually absurd if you think about it. Without going into too much of a waffle, I’d just like to emphasise how horrified I would be if my husband was so interested in how a fellow modest blogger dressed that he went out of his way to address it to that woman, and on a public platform! FYI don’t be fooled either ladies by the positive tones that some of these guys may use and the fact that their intention is ALWAYS from a good place.. they’re just trying to save other ‘women from falling down the wrong path.’ I mean what is this God-like attitude that guys have when it comes to religion and the idea that they’re the saviour of the youth?? WHO ARE YOU KIDDING MATE? Another form of disguise that these men will use is giving back handed compliments to the woman that they’re ‘advising.’ As if we need affirmation from some random Muslim guy who is adamant that we need help from him and his five years of learning at some  Islamic class in a mosque in East London somewhere! Sometimes I think bruh, why don’t you just go tell my dad if you really want to do things properly? Oh, and what about my husband? He’s older than you, knows me more than anyone else on this planet, yet you still think that I need validation or advice from some jumped up ex wannabe road-man NON MAHRAM Muslim guy that found a bit of fame from posing as the ‘cool sheikh for the youth’ online? Never mind the assumptions they have in regards to why we do whatever it is they feel so condemned to comment on. Or the assumptions that we haven’t been raised well enough clearly, otherwise they wouldn’t feel so compelled to comment. Or the assumptions that we’re ‘lost’ and we need guidance, or the assumption that we’ve never studied Islam ourselves, right??

UGHHHHH, It actually makes me sick.

LITERALLY DAFUQ???

Listen ladies, this post is for you more than anyone, especially the younger girls that watch me or read my posts. It’s so easy to get sucked into and believe in a ‘religious persona’ especially when it’s a guy who’s relatable, young and used to be a ‘bad man’ but changed recently. Don’t get sucked in, trust me most of these men are clueless when it comes to Islam. The way they’re addressing things even if it sounds positive, there will always be an underlying tone of misogyny and aggression or sense of power. It is not the attitude a genuine practising Muslim man should be carrying. Most of the time just the delivery of their message is just enforcing the idea to you the young female audience, that Muslim women are under the thumb of a man and that we constantly need validation from them.

Just know that you don’t. You have your own mind.

Use it.

Think about things freely. Free from the way you’ve been taught, if the way you’ve been taught respects men more than women. Literally open your eyes to whats around you and question everything, our generation and our kids will be the ones to make the changes, we will be the ones to take control of our future without the subconscious manipulation that is constantly used by men of our religion, that comes from a sense of entitlement, power trips and religious abuse, that we as a community are constantly excusing and allowing.

DON’T ALLOW IT ANYMORE.

187 Comments
  1. TL

    October 17, 2017 5:24 pm

    Yeeesss! I’m so tired of people feeling entitled to comment on my appearance. Wish this was mandatory reading for all men.

  2. Amna

    October 17, 2017 6:00 pm

    They’re afraid of female empowerment and worried you’ll set a bad example to other Muslim females. They also think they have ownership over females.

  3. E

    October 17, 2017 6:19 pm

    This! If everyone concentrated on working on themselves rather than judging others, the world would be a better place.

    • Sana

      August 26, 2018 9:12 am

      i love this quote it’s current

  4. MH

    October 17, 2017 6:23 pm

    Thank you Dina!!!! True, true and true. I hope a lot of men learn from this and finally understand those back handed compliments aren’t helping anyone…

  5. Shu

    October 17, 2017 6:26 pm

    Yaaaas. This is so accurate. Don’t let anyone tell you how you should dress or behave. Live your truth. Be you!

  6. Jasmine

    October 17, 2017 6:27 pm

    What a load of crap . Most of these males believe it or not come from a good genuine concerned place as many young females think that what you are portraying is hijaab . It’s very self righteous of you to think that many of them are not even clued up islamically.who do u love more Allah or your ulterior motives . (Concerned female )

    • Dina Torkia

      October 17, 2017 6:29 pm

      And what exactly are my ulterior motives?

    • Minahil Ahmad

      October 17, 2017 7:20 pm

      It’s to lead all the young girls down the wrong path so you can have all the space in heaven. Foiled again, Dina.
      What kind of concerned female says “Yea guys should totally be allowed to judge everything we wear they clearly know better”. It doesn’t matter if its genuine concern or not. You have no right to comment on how someone else chooses to dress especially someone that didn’t ask for your opinion and isn’t related to you. Thats not concern thats called being creepy and controlling.

    • Jasmine

      October 17, 2017 7:39 pm

      I get to each their own but don’t push your agenda of what u doing is OK . I seriously admired you in the beggining but as your following grew your hijaab and clothes shrunk . As a Muslima in the public eye u influence so many young minds . What would you like on your scales by Allah . That you helped young women be proud of their Islam and identity or become apologetic

    • Maria

      October 17, 2017 7:48 pm

      “Don’t push your agenda” as you push your agenda on her. This type of comment is EXACTLY what she is referring to in this column.

    • Ain Al-Idrus

      October 18, 2017 1:40 am

      Case in point, ladies and gentlemen.

    • Sabina

      October 26, 2017 11:46 pm

      Dina’s worn the hijab majority of her life, and has fulfilled half of her deen. What have you done?
      Dina has been an inspiration to loads of Muslim women out there, promoting modesty as well as fashion. Why should a random Muslim man who isn’t even her mahram be allowed to comment on what she wears and does? And why do you feel like giving negative comments. If u don’t have anything nice to say don’t say it at all

    • DINAS FAN

      October 17, 2017 9:06 pm

      Dina I think u are a strong powerful woman. Whatever u said was right. Im just loving the fact that u made this article. You and Sid are a perfect couple. Can u plz reply to this comment and I love you. BYE!!!

    • wdaniels

      October 18, 2017 5:53 pm

      I think people need to come to terms with the fact that Dina is not a islamic role model and just like all of us she doesnt know everything. She is just a blogger, a woman who loves fashion and is trying to make a living and I must add she does encourage alot of young girls to dress more modestly. Also she doesnt bring religion into most of her blogs which I think is right. I do however think you need a PR person Dina, cause your post dosent makr much sense I also think its was based on more on emotion than actual fact.

    • Shanice

      October 19, 2017 7:55 am

      I agree. The reason I subscribed to you in the first place was because I loved how you dressed modestly and was still in fashion. You had such a sweet personality, didn’t swear alot then either. Your slogan said it all ‘keep it covered’, now its the opposite of that lol. Fame has got to you darling. I’ve unsubscribed now, this is the first time I’ve left a comment, didn’t really care before because it’s your life you do what you want with it. But do feel sorry for the girls that follow you, defo make sure my daughter’s don’t. Soz love

    • SK

      October 21, 2017 2:50 am

      Your attitude has changed over the years Dina. You were a lot calmer, chilled out, kinder and humble before. Now, you seem to have become more agressive and a tad defensive. Mostly people do guide other muslims, just take it on the chin and accept it in the most humblest way possible. Rather than act up and throw your rattle out of the pram like your a little kid. We all get these comments and i know it hurts you more as you are in the public eye but you just seem to become so overly sensitive. Its constructive critisiscm, most of it. And I’m not one of them type to give catty comments of hate to rile you, esp when I’m old enough to be your mum and want to help you. I can understand plenty of comments may be hurtful, why not look at the positive ones instead? I hope you don’t lash out at my comments but recognise that you need to learn how to deal with constructive feedback, rather than continue to hit out more and more as you get older.

    • Orpa

      January 26, 2018 1:29 pm

      I can’t breathe…”foiled again Dina”

      Didn’t even read past that Marvel script Captain Hook dumbass comment tbh, ANYWAY glad you made this post, I agree 100%

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 6:52 pm

      Jasmine, Your words ring out self-righteousness. Are you so blind? At least Dina is covered. Yes, a little hair is exposed. Some may not understand it nor agree with it. Same goes with those who choose to not wear it at all, or those who choose to wear the niqab or burqa. The verse regarding us to be covered is asked directly to each woman. Not to the men. They have their own guidelines to work on. It is up to the individual muslim woman to choose how to interpret it. Okay we can’t pick and choose. But behaving badly towards women no matter how they disguise it is not the right act.
      Jasmine, you may need to educate yourself on the psyche of men. There you shall find the truth.
      Dina’s MO is stating the obvious because most of us are too tired to bitch about it to our fellow sisters. Salam.

    • Lily Bitch

      October 17, 2017 6:54 pm

      Who do she loves more? DAFUQ bitch didn’t she just finished saying she don’t give a fuck about ppl opinions. Why u still at it bruh?

    • Hiba

      October 17, 2017 7:24 pm

      Who are you to say what qualifies as hijab and doesn’t?? First of all the quran doesn’t even mention hijab so it’s debateable if women are really required to wear them. There is no “right way” to wear hijab. Everything in our religion is open up to interpretation and each individual interprets differently, it’s only Allah who can judge. We have no worldly Pope or religious leader we need to impress in order to be a good muslim. You really think your comment belittling someone’s fashion choice is going to get you into Jannah? Wow the ummah is so sick and blind with patriarchy and orthodoxy, the prophet must be rolling in his grave

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 8:03 pm

      Yes, another sister with some sense.

    • Rizwan

      October 18, 2017 10:50 am

      “First of all the quran doesn’t even mention hijab so it’s debateable if women are really required to wear them. There is no “right way” to wear hijab” you need to read Quran once again or better ask some person with sound intellect.

    • Hassan

      October 18, 2017 5:22 pm

      You are totally lost my sister. I highly advice you to research on the topic of hijab. It is clear that a women has to wear it and the proper conditions that come with it. Dont let your weak knowledge take you to the wrong oath

    • noorah

      October 20, 2017 9:27 am

      Sister that is incorrect, the quran does mention the Hijab quite clearly in different verses, it is just described as a khimaar. If the Quran did not mention to cover, then muslim women would not cover full stop. It is very important to follow the Quran and Sunnah and if you don’t know something then to read upon it or ask an Islamic scholar. I agree with you though, its not upon us to judge what other people wear and just because someone is struggling with hijab does not mean that they are a bad muslim, someone could be completely covered and not even practice. I think its time people re educated themselves and focus more on their own flaws, rather than judging other people. A mans hijab is to lower his gaze, Dina is correct people always blame the women, i was not born a muslim and coming into islam i have seen how muslim men behave and its so sad but that doesn’t count for all muslim men as there is many good brothers who follow the faith accordingly. May allah forgive us all.

    • jimjam

      October 17, 2017 7:37 pm

      well said

    • Sara

      October 17, 2017 8:26 pm

      I do not understand how people feel this ‘divine entitlement’ to tell others how they should live their lives as if God Himself had appointed them judges.
      As you people believe you somehow enjoy a direct communication line with God or that you better than everybody else what He wants, let me respond with His words and those of the Prophet.

      The Prophet “I have not been ordered (by Allah) to search the hearts of the people or cut open their bellies.” –so please tell Jasmine what makes you feel morally above all of us, above the Prophet and to the level of God himself the Ultimate judge????
      ALL judgment belongs to Allah as He is the best of judges and Youm-Al Qiyaam, the Day of Judgement, is called that for a reason. Focus on YOURSELF instead of OTHERS, leave the arrogance of pretending you know better than others what is right or wrong because “Verily, your Lord knows better, who (among men) has gone astray from His Path, and He knows better those who are guided”.(Surah Qalam:7)

      IN OTHER WORDS, MIND YOUR BUSINESS, STAY AT YOUR PLACE, GOD IS HERE FOR THAT.

    • Hassan

      October 18, 2017 5:24 pm

      No i wont mind my business. Allah has told us clearly in the Quean to forbid the evil and enjoin good. Are you lost or do you never recite the quran? Please pick, becouse it seems to me you dont even know the basics in Islam.

    • DINAS FAN

      October 17, 2017 9:01 pm

      You are wrong Dina is right
      Have you seen the comments?
      Im so damn surprised
      Just take 2 sec and look at least 3 comments
      Go to dinas video about mean comments and wait for the last comment
      That would tell u what she is on about!!!

    • Izmir

      October 17, 2017 9:48 pm

      These negative comments are crap! Genuinely crap! 👎🏼Apparently not everyone has a clear understanding of anything. Well of course. In my eyes Dina is a gorgeous outstanding figure to all girls and woman out there, because she is herself! From what I watch, she is the best, out standing mother and role model to her beautiful daughter. Her daughter is so blessed to have a mother she can look up to when she gets older and to have a mother who is wise & a good, smart, best role model. There’s not a dam thing wrong with the way she dresses. She is fully dressed! She is herself, and that right there is what makes her unique! She is a sister I would love to have a pleasure to meet one day, inshallah! It would be an honor. She says all the right things from what I see in her videos! Not one thing she could of explained wrong. I’m not standing up for anyone here! I’m just frankly tired of other Muslims commenting negative things on another Sisters or brothers post. If u don’t have anything good to type with ya disposable thumbs, don’t type at all! If you’re going to be a critic, at least have the decency to be a respectable one! Doesn’t make you Muslim if you judge other sisters on the internet. Just because you’re behind your phone, doesn’t mean Allah (swt) is not watching you judge your sisters or brothers on the internet. Besides the hateful comments, if you’re reading this Dina, your article was truly an article worth reading! I don’t usually comment on anything on the internet nor you tube videos, but I just had to express my opinion. You’re a beautiful, smart, intelligent sister. Keep doing what you’re doing! I hope Allah (swt) always brings you and your family happiness!

    • Annoyed

      October 17, 2017 10:10 pm

      Being genuine and concerned still does not give them the right to comment on her dress. Would you message a male blogger and tell him he is not dressing according to the school of thought that you follow? It is not the place of these men to tell Dina what she should and shouldn’t be wearing.

    • Hassan

      October 18, 2017 5:28 pm

      Yes a women can comment on a mans way of dressing. You do know that a man cannot wear a trousers above the ankle? There is no such thing as school of thought. Its clear, dont make our deen sound complicated, to allow people to deviate.

    • Hassan

      October 18, 2017 5:28 pm

      Yes a women can comment on a mans way of dressing. You do know that a man cannot wear a trousers above the ankle? There is no such thing as school of thought. Its clear, dont make our deen sound complicated, to allow people to deviate. Lool

    • Khadija

      October 25, 2017 10:47 pm

      I completely agree with you!

    • Khadija

      October 25, 2017 10:49 pm

      I agree with Jasmine!!!

    • Iqra

      November 1, 2017 12:17 am

      It is not like Dina is naked or shows excessive skin. This is her way of dress and what she’s saying is that it is no mans business, she is an independent individual. A non-mahrem should be busy lowering his gaze not attacking women left and right , being demoralizing instead of being kind and patien? Dina is not forcing anyone to follow her style; and wtf does “MISLED” even mean. Since when are we allowed to judge what type of hijab is permitted or not? If anything young muslim girls who watch Dina are inspired and feel more involved and this is very important noting that muslim girls have very little say in today’s world! Nothing but love and support for you Dina.xo

    • Lovely475

      January 25, 2018 7:11 pm

      No they don’t come from a concerned place, they come from A very perverted place, Most of the men I know that mention a women’s appearance spend most of their time oogling other women [ not their hijabi wives] at a strip club and likely looking at porn on their phone. Their root problem is a sick perverse relationship and obsession with women. My husband wouldn’t DARE make any comments like that about another woman, and trust me my husband is more religious than his counterparts who do. I’ve seen my friend’s husbands message non muslim Instagram models with concern on their dress…LOL what are they recruiting second wives? I don’t wear a hijab and to protect me my husband has cut me off from my hijabi friends whom husbands felt the need to comment on my lack of hijab or dress. That’s right my husband won’t allow me to be friends with these perverted men’s wives as just by association they felt they had some say towards me. My husbands immediately sensed the perverse nature. Not to mention that same man tried to offer me a ride when I was walking alone, no sir, I don’t wear a hijab but u know about RESPECT and I RESPECT my husband and religion.

      My lack of hijab doesn’t allow you to disrespect me.

    • Sarah a

      December 1, 2018 1:40 am

      I wrote about something similar to this
      I disagree with how somehow Dina has become the face of Muslim women all of a sudden when there is a lot of us that don’t agree with it.
      Anyways have a read guys !
      https://secretexpectations.wordpress.com/2018/11/30/it-really-be-your-own/

  7. DewiB

    October 17, 2017 6:34 pm

    Yes, I have become very dissapointed in the Muslim men who cry out their self-righteous statements (Okay, I’m being polite coz I’m also disgusted). But it saddens me because they are so blinded by their egos and arrogance that we who truly see through their words and behavior see that they have not been shown their own straight paths. They are too busy correcting other’s paths when they should work on themselves. Life is short. I’m just thankful I have an academic father who has instilled in me the kind true teachings in Islam.

    • Layla

      October 25, 2017 6:46 am

      From navel to knee , please study fiqh

  8. Lea

    October 17, 2017 6:35 pm

    Loved reading this till ‘a mosque in east london somewhere’ ‘ex roadman wannabe’ – you don’t want to be judge or criticised and rightly so, yet judge and belittle

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 8:40 pm

      Salam Lea,
      Dina isn’t judging or belittling with that statement. She is being anecdotal and sarcastic. Can you not feel the exhaustion in her words. She is so tired of this form of behaviour. That’s all. And when you have a personable sense of humour, you tend to speak this way. I for sure do the same thing. Sadly, there are those who can’t differentiate it and take it too literally. Wassalam.

  9. Coleen Mullen

    October 17, 2017 6:39 pm

    Well said I think you look fabulous, I love your relationship with your husband and I’m sure most of these horrible comments wish they could have what you have. Well done your a brilliant role model for your daughter 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  10. Sana

    October 17, 2017 6:43 pm

    YES DINA 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

  11. LL

    October 17, 2017 6:46 pm

    maybe it’s not your style, each their own, but some people screen comments and share them with the commentators moms and wives.

  12. SANA

    October 17, 2017 6:47 pm

    YES DINA 👏👏👏

  13. Fatima Zahra

    October 17, 2017 6:49 pm

    When you do the right thing in the sight of Allah, He makes it easier upon you. But when you speak and act differently on the true meanings of Islam then you will get hit back by many Muslims. As Muslim women we should act modest, we are given ultimate rights Alhamdulillah. There are no such restrictions upon dressing in an oppressed way or living in an oppressed way. If you choose to be modern and change the Islamic dress code or whatever it may be then know that’s why you get a terrible back lash on others. Islam is so simple, yet people like you make it so difficult because you choose to make your own rules and disregard the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad [pbuh] and the Islamic rulings given by our Creator, Allah. We have the 4 best role models: Khadijah, Fatimah, Aasiyah, and Maryam [may Allah be pleased with them]. They are the women of Paradise. There are no pictures of them. Just inspiring stories and lessons from their life. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But how we address it to others is so important. I pray Allah guides us all Ameen.

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 8:18 pm

      Fatima,
      Your advise hides demeaning messages. You are allowed to choose to live your life through the orthodoxian teaching path. But judge not those who interpret the truth through educated eyes. How you assume that Dina is getting punished by Allah (Astaghrifullah). Only Allah knows who is being punished on earth or is just going through their own trials.
      Modesty in itself has many interpretations.
      The reason there are no pics of those beautiful women is because they didn’t want to make the same mistake the second time round where we start seeing them as God’s. (Astaghrif). There is nothing wrong with Dina having pics of herself to view to the rest of the world. (I read behind your judgemental lines) Salam.

    • Fatima Zahra

      October 17, 2017 8:23 pm

      I never mentioned she will punished by Allah. That’s not my place to tell others about punishment. Just as you have your comments I have mines. And this is regarding to her post whether you like it or not. Thank you. Salaam.

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 8:55 pm

      Aaah, yes, misread it. My bad. Forgive me.
      Though that last sentence seems a bit finicky. Dear sister, the post is in concern with the bad behavior of men. Comment wise, it is fine that you are reminding us that there are those who follow the orthodoxian teachings. And Dina is smart enough to realise that those who do may act improperly. That is why this post is to remind these men that being religious also means behaving religiously. As in kindly, without judgement. Wassalam.

    • FYB

      October 17, 2017 9:41 pm

      I get your point and i understand what you mean. I get that we need to correct each other when we do wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it. But the way we do that, is what pushes people away. Even if some Muslims feel they are doing the right thing to please Allah, you’ll find other Muslims who don’t think it’s the right thing. I don’t know if you get what am saying. Muslims are constantly judging each other…discriminating each other…why does that happen constantly in the Muslim world? You have been guided by Allah, Alhamdulillah..now you start to notice people doing the wrong things and instead of being nice and more loving to them, you start to become judgemental. And meanwhile you were not doing the right thing before Allah showed you the right way. BTW me using you is not referring to you. The way the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) guided other people to the right path, and invited other people to Islam was so beautiful and kind. Not the way our Muslim brothers and sisters are doing now. Now you wouldn’t say Dina Tokio is a bad person..she also has some good in her…and i wouldn’t say she doesn’t do some wrong…she’s human..and we are all sinners. So if people want her to correct those wrong, why don’t they do it in a more beautiful way. They can also pray to Allah to guide her, and the entire Muslim Ummah because clearly she is not the only one. It may seem that am supporting Dina Tokio. In a way i am…. i see a lot of people commenting really hurtful and hateful things on her page…some even insulting her cute little daughter…and most of these people are Muslims. Sometimes I wonder were the love we need show each other is being kept. How do you expect her to listen to these people? That doesn’t mean there are things i don’t disagree on. I wrote this fully aware that Allah is aware of what am writing. I hope i didn’t offend you…and i hope you see what i mean. And Ameen Ya rabbil alameen to your du’a.

    • Ruhaya

      October 18, 2017 4:57 am

      Totally agree my dear Fatimah Zahra. JazakAllah . We love to wish for our brother and sister what we wish for ourselves.

    • DB

      October 20, 2017 10:52 pm

      While I acknowledge your intent is to be gentle and defend your religion, the background of your statement is incredibly insidious in that it perpetuates the idea that Muslimahs must be neither be seen nor heard. At no point does Dina ever act immodestly (from what she has posted and promoted) and for you to assume she does not practice her religion appropriately is incredibly cruel. It’s not your place to pass judgement on the way she practices her faith, and, assuming you do not know her personally, there is no way for you to know that. What these finger-wagging men and you are essentially doing is policing others right to practice, grow, learn and live within this beautiful religion. It’s judgement and constant scrutiny like this that prevents a lot of people from feeling welcome into the community.

      “If you choose to be modern and change the Islamic dress code or whatever it may be then know that’s why you get a terrible back lash on others. ” This is an incredibly problematic statement in that you equate modernity with sin. Additionally, you promote the idea that the onus of preventing cruel, condescending messages is to simply adhere to cultural expectations, not the actual words and practices described in the Quran. I think you’re equating “modern” with “Western.” If this is the case, then it is completely baffling and irrelevant. I have never seen commenters admonish Muslim men on social media for wearing what appears to be silk or gold or exposing their torso below the chest when at the beach. I mention this because the rules of modesty apply to both genders. We hold Muslim women to a very shallow standard of appearing traditionally modest and then disregarding the remainder of their actions and words. We don’t seem to care what Muslim women do so long as they are satisfactorily covered and out of sight. Men are held to a deeper and more complex standard than that.

      I sincerely wish people like Dina were promoted more when I was younger. Perhaps I would have felt more welcome into the community rather than constantly attacked and shamed for speaking or even letting my hair slip out of my headscarf. It’s time to start taking responsibility for the way we each practice and to not pass judgment on others so long as they’re not harming or hurting others. This by no means is an attack on you, but, rather, a plea to reconfigure the way you think and observe others who practice your faith.

  14. RK

    October 17, 2017 6:52 pm

    I read this with ur voice in my head the whole time lol

    • Atikah Aziz

      October 18, 2017 12:19 am

      Same. Haha

  15. Joan

    October 17, 2017 6:52 pm

    Yaaas girl! I’m not muslim but I love your blog and videos and I’ve been following you for quite some time. Nevertheless I tend to get really angry about some of the comments you and Sid receive on your videos. Glad you don’t take it to the heart and keep things real! Love from Germany🖖

  16. Sara

    October 17, 2017 6:55 pm

    I’m a young woman whose been following your work for several years now. While I agree with what you say regarding men, what about the women who are offended by your interpretation of hijab to young people? You clearly would not wear the turban or your hair out like that at Hajj. It’s clear you’re struggling but if you’re going to make money off of hijab and modest fashion, address the fact that you’re TRYING but NOT representing appropriate islamic wear. You are getting comments from women who mean well but waswasa is making you defensive. Do what you want but know that you have a responsibility to make people aware that you in fact, are not perfect in your hijab. That’s all.

    • Henna

      October 17, 2017 9:12 pm

      She has mentioned this in a previous video. She talked about how she is struggling with her hijab and how she shouldn’t be looked up to as a role model. Just watched a previous Q&A of hers

    • Annoyed

      October 17, 2017 10:15 pm

      I’m pretty sure Dina has only ever talked about promoting ‘modest’ fashion. I don’t think I ever recall her saying that she is dressing as all Muslim women should dress. Also you do realise that there are many interpretations of the hijab in Islam?

    • Heather

      October 18, 2017 12:24 pm

      On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

      “Part of the perfection of one’s Islam is his leaving that which does not concern him.”

  17. Jasmine Abuali

    October 17, 2017 6:56 pm

    Yes!!! Thank you for addressing this!

  18. Fathima zahra

    October 17, 2017 7:03 pm

    I agree with you Dina. I don’t believe a man should worry about other woman. About saving them or teaching them or critizing them. They should not. If you want to guide someone, guide your sister or your wife or mother or even a cousin. Even if you are a woman over adorned and not fully Islamicly dressed you don’t have to say anything because YOU NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LOOKING. I am not perfect but if you want to be ‘Islamic’ then that is not islamic behaviour. Keep your gaze down and stop lookin at woman in social media or anywhere.

  19. Reema B.

    October 17, 2017 7:07 pm

    I think you are a strong and beautiful mother capable of taking in constructive criticism when you need it so I”ll say this: put aside what the men are saying because it’s not their business but when your SISTERS speak up – take at least a tiny bit to heart. Your earnings are coming from these “followers” and the day you start ignoring your sisters opinions is the day you no longer deserve their support. There is a clear regression in your covering since when you began. I hope that whatever you went through that caused you to get to this point improves and that you can get on a path back to focusing on what hijab is. Why is it necessary to expose more of your skin and hair. Respect the ayah of hijab in the Quran. You very well are aware of everyone noticing the change. I think the most important thing you’re not doing is acknowledging the change in public and focusing on improving it. If you don’t care then that can only be at a loss to you.

  20. Najeebah

    October 17, 2017 7:12 pm

    I think this is spot on! I have a cousin who is married to a guy who got super annoyed that she wore fake nails and ranting about how Haram it was ro wear them. So she got fed up and they went to see the Iman. He gave them literally the best advise I’ve ever heard from a Muslim man…just because you are head of the household and responsible for your family does not mean you have control of your wife’s body. That is her choice. Furthermore he told them that as the man he has far to much to do and be responsible for to be “checking up” on his wife and trying to tell her what to do all the time. These men are so wrapped up in the patriarchal, masoganistic , society that we live in that some of them can’t see straight and it causes women to be abused and mistreated…by the way also not Islam. I’m glad you are shedding light on this.
    Salams

    • Heather

      October 18, 2017 12:19 pm

      That Imam sounds cool as heck Masha’Allah.

  21. Z

    October 17, 2017 7:16 pm

    Love this post, thank you Dina! So many Muslim men feel that they have the right to comment on the way women dress when actually modesty starts from within. There will be some Muslim women who cover up more than others but by the way they act and portray themselves actually appear more attractive. We constantly hear about Muslim women who aren’t dressing properly but hardly ever hear about some Muslim men who don’t cover their awrah and post pictures of their six-packs and “gym bodies” which also appear attractive. Both men and women need to realise that “hijab” isn’t just the material on a woman’s head but is a barrier to protect BOTH men and women and that BOTH men and women should observe the hijab.

  22. Anisah Ali

    October 17, 2017 7:20 pm

    I absolutely loved this Dina! I agree with everything you said, this was written so beautifully and it was on point! Muslim men need to be reminded that it’s not their place to tell us what we should do in the name of islam. I hope many people learn from this especially young girls 🙂

  23. Nadeem

    October 17, 2017 7:26 pm

    As a 17 year old muslim teenager, i feel disgusted by how alot of muslim men feel they have the right to comment on how other women should dress. KMT fam lower your gaze, how you bashing someone else for what theyre wearing when youre preeing… dumb fool and its the womans body the only males that have a right to voice their opinion is their father/brother and this is only allowed as advice IMO. No one should be forced to do anything that they don’t want to. Like honestly educate yourself you twat. Why do you havve the right to chat about someone elses clothing, their relationship with god is between god and them. There is a fine line between encouraging youths to dress modestly and bashing people for what they wear, most muslim men and women are unable to differentiate between them and end up insulting people for no reason. Just focus on yourself and your relationship with god you neeqs.

    • SP

      October 17, 2017 7:46 pm

      Thank God for peope like you, honestly this is so reftrshing to hear from a 17 year old guy, I am a 16 year old female and I never thought muslim guys our age would have this opinion!!

      Love it!!!

    • SP

      October 17, 2017 7:50 pm

      Refreshing, I meant !

  24. Reem Sohib

    October 17, 2017 7:27 pm

    Dina I really love you and I don’t know the guys who criticize you and what is their motive but maybe you are wrong.
    religion is advise (الدين النصيحة) may be they really care and that doesn’t mean that anyone is flawless we are all sinners.

  25. Anonymous

    October 17, 2017 7:27 pm

    Reading this has just made my evening.

  26. A

    October 17, 2017 7:30 pm

    👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  27. A

    October 17, 2017 7:32 pm

    👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
    love it!!!

  28. A

    October 17, 2017 7:33 pm

    👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  29. jimjam

    October 17, 2017 7:36 pm

    if you post your life online with the option to comment then expect comments whether its from men or women. Correcting each other in Islam is a must so don’t be defensive just cos it comes from a man.

    • DewiB

      October 17, 2017 7:57 pm

      Jimjam, what is compulsory of us is to remind eachother how to be a good Muslim. Not to criticize in a bad behavior way. Not through forms of demeaning statements, belittling or being masoginistic. This entry is her way (representing a lot of us muslim sister’s) to remind men and those women who blindly support these men, that this is not the right way to act.
      Ridiculing her and what she chooses to wear or say is reflecting on what your own hearts and minds is filled with = hate. Pure and simple hate. Wassalam.

    • jimjam

      October 18, 2017 12:52 pm

      If you read her post she write “The way they’re addressing things even if it sounds positive, there will always be an underlying tone of misogyny and aggression or sense of power”. If you are defensive you will always interpret thing in your own way or as Ridicule if you cant take it. If she could take it she would see them as positive reminders without any “underlying tones”. “And Remind for verily a reminder benefits the believer”(51:55).

    • DewiB

      October 19, 2017 6:17 am

      Dear brother, it is fine. You are blinded and ignorant in what the meaning of mysogyny is and what it entails. For you prefer to be comfortable with your male view and not humbled and fearful by your lack of understanding of how men should speak towards a woman. She is speaking the words that many many sisters experience and feel. So it is my obligation to remind you that your beliefs and behavior screams of arrogance and denial. I look to my father who is an academic and also one who has made many weekly sermons in our community mosque. I look to my male cousins and uncle’s. Yet none of them go around wasting time checking out other women and and ‘reminding them’ by ways of for example, say ‘you look sexy or beautiful’ or ‘you shouldn’t be walking around wearing that’ to any muslim sister. In fact if my mum or their wives and mothers found out they would of gotten an ear full from them.
      So answer me this brother, are you saying there is more priority in preaching your righteous (and are you totally certain you are in the right in the first place) views directly to a woman? Should you not be concentrating and spending more of your time on learning to be a kind and humbled and forgiving person first. Someone who is not 100% sure that their righteous actions are the right ones. Spend more time in prayer, thinking and praising and asking Allah’s forgiveness. Spending your days wisely. Probably even educate yourself on how to walk through life not judging others.
      of course one should be obligated to remind others to pray five times a day. to not fight. to not steal. to always recite the ayat Kursi when you having nothing interesting to do. Maybe brother if you can’t understand the overview of this Blog, then it is better to keep quiet and not fitnah. Realise that she is addressing those People who are a guilty party to this.
      You may be able to memorise the verses but do you truly know how to be a humbled muslim? But don’t fear brother for we are Insya Allah already lucky and blessed to have found the right path and guidance. And in that, we have our own jihad to work on. Dear brother, prioritise your jihad rather than others. Wassalam.

  30. Asma

    October 17, 2017 7:36 pm

    You’ve spoken the words out of my mouth! Speechless. Golden wordsss♡

  31. SP

    October 17, 2017 7:37 pm

    You go girl!!!
    This is what we need, a proud, strong and influential woman to say it as it is, and settle this once and for all.
    I just sincerely want to thank you for this post, seriously made my day, and its also great to show males and show them how we feel.
    Love you lots Dina, a badass woman who actually brings about awareness, instead of just saying so!!!!! (Hint, Hint)

  32. SP

    October 17, 2017 7:41 pm

    Also, just wanted to add that anyone who dislikes you, striving for empowerment in the 21st century, is a **** for all I care, you do you and keep going because for people like me, who genuinely see your point, you are great!!

  33. Simon garner

    October 17, 2017 7:41 pm

    Hi I’m not a Muslim, but am a man, I agree totally with what you say.. personally I don’t think any man should tell any female what to do or wear… I certainly wouldn’t tell my wife of 30 years what to do!!!! Good for you, my best wishes to you

  34. Shamal

    October 17, 2017 7:45 pm

    Dude you dont even know the kind if feels this gave me. As a muslim (non hijab wearing) girl, it is no ones right to tell me how i can dress or not dress. I know what my relationship with Allah is and i am fully aware of what I’m doing right or wrong and if i were ever to change, it would be MY OWN choice. No man will ever take our choice away, so preach sister!!! 🙌🏻

  35. Inayah Zia

    October 17, 2017 7:45 pm

    Well said Dina couldn’t have said it better myself! I’ve been following u for a while now and I love ur resilience and the way you empower others because u have been one of the main ppl I look up to, you put an amazing message out their especially for the Muslim youth.I am a young Muslim girl and I am so empowered and inspired by you, like u I love having a good rant myself tbh you have taught me many things i love ur videos they always put a smile on my face when I was being bullied every single day at school for like 2 years you taught me to stand up for myself especially in a witty way and it helped me so much.I love your personality (from what I see online) and I can just see what an amazing person u are.Keep doing you became u are amazing ❤️Thank you ❤️

  36. Zeliha

    October 17, 2017 7:50 pm

    Dina! Love your post. Once this Muslim page actually dm’d me and the users of the page are both female and male. But the guy approached me and complimented my beauty and then afte that told me that I ‘should’ not post photos of myself and do whatever he’s saying for me to do “for my own good”. It’s understandable, bc by Allah, it is a commandment to be modest as women. However, what’s not understandable relating to your point is that they feel the right to dictate our choices as women, whether religion based or not, whether Muslim or not. Men usually have this mentality and it sucks. When he called me out like that, I confidently told him that “you called me beautiful” which means you “looked” at my photos and now you’re trying to advise me without applying the same advice to yourself. And I also told him, if there is any situation to be talked through to a women regarding her appearance or anything, you ask your Instagram female partner and she will discuss it with me in the dm. And then he realised he was coming from a hypocritical place and apologised and told me that I am right. This! If anyone irl or online approaches you like this, just tell ’em!

  37. M

    October 17, 2017 8:04 pm

    Great post, Dina
    What these guys also don’t realise is how the Prophet PBUH interacted with non-mahram women. He treated them with respect and the hayaa (modesty) they deserved, as well as showing to us all the etiquettes in talking to a non-mahram.
    These days some ‘muslim bruddas) think they have an enitlement, they feel like women are below them when of course they have no clue about the greatest women in islam. Honestly these guys need to back off, your religion is personal to you and I like how you’ve never really preacged about it and kept yourself professional. You do you man!

  38. Safia

    October 17, 2017 8:06 pm

    BRILLIANT!!! 👏👏👏 such an honest and well written piece. Truth is, we as muslims need more voices like this. Because the toxic masculinity amongst Muslim men is nothing short of nauseating and terribly dangerous. Thank you for speaking up- particularly when there is inevitably a chorus of criticism that follows such a bold, yet necessary statement. May you always be so bold and ready to spread good and kindness ❤️

  39. Ptissem

    October 17, 2017 8:15 pm

    I love this so much.
    But what I find interesting (and confusing) are the amount of comments regarding how Dina dresses or how she wears her hijab – and how this is a bad example blah blah blah.
    I don’t think I remember Dina ever standing up and saying ‘Hey everyone, this is how a Muslim girl should dress so make sure you all follow me and do the same OK!’
    She’s just dressing how she feels comfortable dressing. And she happens to be a Muslim.
    No one is forced to follow her style. That’s not why she’s doing what she’s doing.
    She’s a fashion and beauty blogger.
    She’s famous for doing the above very well – and not because she’s trying to teach people how to dress.
    She’s just being herself.
    And so should everybody else.

  40. Maya

    October 17, 2017 8:16 pm

    I’m not muslim Dina but i totally agree. I think the muslim men need to take a good hard look at themselves and stop acting like they can continue to control women. Infact i think asian men that are very traditional in general have this too…when a westernised woman speaks her mind or sticks up for herself..then think that she needs to be more traditional. Stop influencing other asian girls so i think its also a cultural thing. Fortunately my husband is very westernised and we are both equal.
    We need to empower young girls to make a change so the future is better for them and their children.
    Keep up the good work Dina.

  41. Zara

    October 17, 2017 8:25 pm

    So on point GIRL! dont they understand that them preeing on your social media is ‘haram’ double standards!

  42. Iskenderia

    October 17, 2017 8:43 pm

    The simple fact that all this “righteous” men watch, read and follow a female fashion icon, who btw is MARRIED, makes me question theire competence of advicing anyone. All you non-mahram man just randomly go look for “half-covered” women on social media? Seriously, thats just creepy….

  43. NOOR

    October 17, 2017 8:53 pm

    Love love love this YA DINA YA HABIBTI

  44. Shame on you

    October 17, 2017 8:56 pm

    Boooooooo

  45. Nisa

    October 17, 2017 8:58 pm

    Wow dinaa! I could not have out it better myself! I totally believe in this! Xx

  46. Maha

    October 17, 2017 9:02 pm

    PREACH SISTER!!!!

  47. A'ishah

    October 17, 2017 9:04 pm

    Thank-you so much for this article. You’re an amazing person!

  48. Ammara.writes

    October 17, 2017 9:27 pm

    You’ve made a great point! I totally agree with you and can’t believe how irritating and immature some muslim men out there behave. You are an adorable person with a sweet and lovable family who shouldn’t be adviced or even judged by such potatos. May Allah bless you and your family! ❤️

  49. Anon

    October 17, 2017 9:32 pm

    I think this post is absolutely wonderful and that really points out some great points. I’m ngl, when I had watched a couple of your videos I did feel like “she shouldn’t be wearing her hijab like that…etc etc “, but I soon realised how wrong I was when I myself commit sins in other ways if not by the way I wear my hijab. I never projected those comnents online but sometimes it was a topic of conversation among friends, etc which I’d like to apologise for. Nevertheless, keep being yourself and staying true to you, you’re amazing 🙂

  50. N.G

    October 17, 2017 9:41 pm

    It’s so nice to see someone who really speaks out about this. It’s just such a shame where most of the judgement we face is from fellow musliums. Shaming people in public is not Islam in itself! No one has the right to judge someone’s hijab as right or wrong hijab is a concept not a cloth. People don’t understand the struggle hijabiss have. Dina keep doing you booooooo !!!!!

  51. Huma Imtiaz

    October 17, 2017 9:46 pm

    Agreed Dina. Now a days everyone becomes a scholar.🙄. I am sick of them as well.

  52. Asmaa

    October 17, 2017 9:56 pm

    At the end of the day, it’s not deen. It’s YOUR deen, it’s MY deen and it’s up to the individual as to how they want to practice. We shouldn’t be concerned with others, especially when they have nothing to do with you. Unless you’re an omnipotent being living in the heavens, it’s not your place to make judgements so please take several seats, mate. Thanks for the post, Dina, it was a good one.

  53. Sarah

    October 17, 2017 10:00 pm

    Well said. Nuff said.

  54. LM

    October 17, 2017 10:08 pm

    Damn, Dina! You are ON POINT with this post and I couldn’t agree more!

  55. A

    October 17, 2017 10:13 pm

    Thank you for telling young women for think for themselves. We need someone like you to help the new generation of women to open there eyes and think for themselves with out a man telling what to do and what not to do for there own lives.

  56. A

    October 17, 2017 10:16 pm

    A
    October 17, 2017
    Thank you for telling young women to think for themselves. We need someone like you to help the new generation of women to open there eyes and think for themselves with out a man telling them what to do and what not to do for there own lives.

  57. Nancy

    October 17, 2017 10:27 pm

    Okay Dina, can you tell me why you had to use “DAFUK” in your article? Far be it from me to judge you “Islamically”, but that was just a choice abbreviation that was uncalled for. Seeking attention much? You may have a large following of young Muslims girls, but a classy role model would certainly give her hijab a shake before posting such a vulgar abbreviation. Stop trying so hard to fit in. You’re entitled to your opinions but keep it classy.

    • Jasmine

      October 19, 2017 7:34 am

      You my new role model for this comment

  58. Nancy

    October 17, 2017 10:28 pm

    Okay Dina, can you tell me why you had to use “DAFUK” in your article? Far be it from me to judge you “Islamically”, but that was just a choice abbreviation that was uncalled for. Seeking attention much? You may have a large following of young Muslims girls, but a classy role model would certainly give her hijab a shake before posting such a vulgar abbreviation. Stop trying so hard to fit in. You’re entitled to your opinions but keep it real. You’re bordering on fake.

  59. Layl

    October 17, 2017 10:52 pm

    Truths. Waves.

  60. Diah

    October 17, 2017 11:07 pm

    Hi Dina, it is nice to read down your thoughts and feelings towards the men Muslims. I’m a Muslim and as same as with you, I wear jeans, improper hijab that sometimes my bangs is seen, and sometimes wear 3/4 sleeves. I feel comfortable with myself by wearing that because I don’t like to be looked so feminine. I do realize that how we dresses is an personal option. I used to don’t care when people comment on how I dress that mostly they complain about my bangs is seen even if I wear hijab. But as the time goes by, I want to know more about my religion and I met a Muslim guy and he also complains about how I dress. Then I realize that I’m wrong as I read hadith that says “Women who dress but naked”. And now, I’m still trying to change on how I dress although sometimes repeat my mistakes.. but yeah, I’m on my way to be better.

    The point on my story is, I think that those Muslim guys are trying to remind you as a Muslim. In fact, it’s not about Mahram nor non-Mahram, but maybe they want to remind you because they suppose you’re their sister. Besides, you are a public figure that everyone will notice every inch on you. That’s such a risk of being public figure to get hatred comments from unknown people, even I’m not a public figure and I got a bad comment on me. I know that sometimes people comment in a rude and indecent way that hurt us. But I think the first best way to face the haters is we have to look inside or introspect ourselves. Maybe that we are wrong so they comment on us. It eventually is our right to take or leave it. May Allah bless us. Salaam.

  61. I feel lost

    October 17, 2017 11:12 pm

    You hit the nail on the head! Every word is to the word ‘t’. You’ve a great job sister. Wish I aware of this when I was younger. I’ve had to learn the hard way.
    Please continue to voice your opinions as clearly you’re speaking on behalf of a majority of Muslim women who would love to ‘shout this out’ but perhaps are ‘guarded’ in some way. (Myself included)

  62. Sabz

    October 17, 2017 11:31 pm

    That was bloody amazing – preaaaach Dina sod em all you do you gurlllll

  63. Sister A.

    October 17, 2017 11:32 pm

    Assalamu ‘alaykum, what saddens me is that for some reason we are now living in a time where we cannot advise our fellow muslims, whether they are female or not. Subhanallah, wasn’t the Prophet Muhammad (salallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) a male who used to advise the Muslim women. Regardless of what these brothers intentions are, if it is done in a nice manner then take it, even if it isn’t done in a nice manner then take it. I am imperfect but wallahi when someone even if I dislike them or whatever, if they were to say ‘Oh sister you shouldn’t do this but this’. Wallahi that would play on my mind and my heart and I would try to seek help from Allah and from the Quran and sunnah. It’s our duty as believers to give naseeha, to help save that other person from committing sin when we are witnesses to that sin. Otherwise that sinner who we chose not to advise will literally blame us on the Day of Judgement for not advising them Subhan’Allah. I am sorry but I am more afraid of being questioned by Allah than what another human thinks of me and so should every other muslim, MALE OR FEMALE. Prophet Muhammad (salallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said to convey from me, even it is one verse. We need to come out of this mentality where we need to have studied the deen for yeaaaaars to even advise each other. We should all be humble, accept the advice from one another and then try to work on ourselves. (Sorry for the long comment).

  64. Hania

    October 18, 2017 12:38 am

    Thank you for posting this Dina!! This brings voice to a much needed discussion! x

  65. Karina

    October 18, 2017 1:40 am

    My friends and I talk about this all the time; and the sad part, it’s not always just Muslim men that do this, but Muslim women as well. Hijab is an undeniable part of our religion and an obligation – that is indisputable, of course – but every Muslim has their struggles and their sins, yet some feel the need to point out and focus on what others are doing wrong. They say to be careful who you point at because there are three fingers pointing right back at you. Those Muslim men and women who point out others’ faults aren’t realizing their own faults. The men should not even notice a woman’s faults in her hijab as his hijab requires his gaze be lowered around non-mahram women. As for the women, they should understand the hijab isn’t an easy thing for everyone.

    I am a convert. When I first began wearing hijab, I didn’t exactly have the best pre-existing wardrobe for it. I was a student in uni, so I couldn’t afford anything different and made use of what I already had. Apparently, one of my shirts was too see-through (I hadn’t even noticed it) and this woman as my mosque – ironically, another convert – publicly shamed me, telling me that everyone could see my lingerie (it was actually a lace tank top from Abercrombie). I felt so embarrassed and hurt that, as a new Muslim, I considered leaving Islam or even taking off the hijab entirely. It was actually a woman in niqab that came up to me later, who apologized for the other lady and told me to keep doing my best as Allah knows my intentions, that kept me from taking it off and staying in Islam. She told me to keep doing my best, even if it wasn’t 100% hijab, because it’s better than no hijab and Allah knows I am trying. A few years later, I still am not the best hijabi, but I’m better than I was. When Muslims support each other, growth can happen; but when we tear each other down, that’s when they can unknowingly cause others to fall even further away from Islam. That, overall, is a far worse sin than a little hair showing.

    Love the post Dina xx

    • DewiB

      October 19, 2017 6:45 am

      Sister Karina, your words nearly made me cry. I am so sorry for having to experience public humility from another sister. I am so glad you were blessed and protected by having another sister console you and motivated you to keep accomplishing your own trials. Wassalam.

    • Andrea Brito

      October 31, 2017 9:01 pm

      I’m sorry for your bad experience and I’m glad that you didn’t leave Islam. I’m a revert too, and in the beginning, I also had a similar experience with others reverts too. They didn’t talk bad about my clothes, but they would talk bad all the time about other muslim girls clothes and how they didn’t dress the “right” way. It was so much negativity that I always would go back home with a headache and ended up avoiding going to the mosque to not meet them. Alhamdulillah, I also didn’t leave Islam because of them.

  66. Nana

    October 18, 2017 2:02 am

    You nailed it 😉

  67. Another Modest Mommy

    October 18, 2017 3:08 am

    Dina, I started watching your vlogs a few months ago. I truly admire the way you carry yourself, how you mother your daughter and your relationship with your husband.

    I sometimes read through the comments and wonder to myself ‘how is it that Dina can read these comments and still do what she does?’. You are a brave woman and regardless of what people say or how they judge you by appearance. The honest fact is that you are an amazing human being and your merits far exceed how you decide to wear your religious apparel. You are an excellent role model. You have sincerely taught me so much about your culture and the beauty within your belief system. I’m an ex Christian now Hebrew not Jewish (One who practices and observes scriptural law and modesty) and I love learning about your culture and your faith through your vlogs. I’ve found that our beliefs are very similar and we have more in common than we do differences. You’ve inspired me to want to wear a head covering, not because it’s required by my faith but because it shows respect to my husband and my Creator.

    I’m so thankful that you continue to push through and brave it every time you upload your vlog. Much props to you! Stay strong and keep doing you!

    • Hijabeefied

      October 18, 2017 8:18 pm

      Loved this feedback.

  68. Anna

    October 18, 2017 4:01 am

    “if a woman is given freedom, she will do a lot of bad, so we need to control her. so you must close your mouth and obey”, – this one imam told me when I came to hear advice about family relations. You understand!?! So what speak about clothes?!!

  69. ashgan

    October 18, 2017 4:31 am

    men are OBSESSED with women if they hate women they’re obsessed with them .harassing , judging complaining hurting, if they love women they’re always thinking about them always after them as well , love or hate men are obsessed with women !

  70. Zahra Panchbhaya

    October 18, 2017 10:17 am

    I couldn’t agree more! Some men think they are know everything amd that it’s their responsibility to tell the world what to do. In reality they are so far removed from what real islam is and how it should be followed. They have no idea what the values of islam are and what the lives of the Prophet PBUH and his sahabah were like in particular how they were so respectful to women and their opinions. Just look at Aisha ra, men used to go to her for advice!

  71. Heather

    October 18, 2017 11:55 am

    AWESOME. Many young women need to hear this. Jazak Allahu khayran sis. ❤️

  72. Mexigogue

    October 18, 2017 12:03 pm

    So you would agree then, that if a Muslim male writes about a subject concerning Muslim males, that you should not get to weigh in on that discussion either too, right? I don’t like the path this type of thinking leads down. And coincidentally, my latest blog post was on the perils of imputing motives.

  73. Nora

    October 18, 2017 1:00 pm

    I literally read everything using the intonations like how u speak! Nway, totally agree with everthing u said! It’s just amazes me that some guys felt like they just have right on opinion on how we dress, but the bigger issues that happens around them, they just completely ignores it! Smoking for example, so many fatwa being said that it is haram as it destroys ur health n body, but did they mention bout that? No, why? Coz they smoke themselves and they don’t think it’s a matter concerning the ummah. Such double standars. duuhhhh…

  74. Sabina

    October 18, 2017 2:52 pm

    I fucking love it! It needed to be said, so thank you for doing just that.

  75. Sara

    October 18, 2017 2:52 pm

    love you dina!!! you were THE blogger that, back in my pre-hijab days, made me think “hey, wearing hijab doesn’t mean i have to compromise beauty/fashion to please god.” i repeat…. THE blogger!!! i am so happy wearing a scarf on my head now and love looking at women that dress modestly and have so much fun in the process. thank you so much! <3

  76. Sumaiya

    October 18, 2017 5:38 pm

    Dinaa!!! You are amazing!! Thanks for exposing these men. I have seen many men who pose as religious (and go to religious excursions) but themselves backbite and use foul language. How can anyone trust these sort of people.
    Thanks for being an inspiration. Ultimately its allah who we all are answerable to. Not these fake shaikhs. Lol

  77. Zainab

    October 18, 2017 5:42 pm

    I love how brave you are. Its truly inspiring. I dont like how muslim girls are always given bayaans and lectures as to how to treat males and be a good wife and stuff. Im only 15 and Ive heard about 30 lectures like this from lecturers at the mosque. Its not right at all when your only 15. If anything, I think muslim guys should also be given lessons on how to treat women but noooo, no imaam or lecturer thinks of educating guys on this matter.

  78. Hijabeefied

    October 18, 2017 8:15 pm

    Girrrrrrllll… THANK YOU!!
    Or when they attack your hijab yet they have pics on their profile without shirts on .. smh

  79. Raeesah

    October 19, 2017 9:28 am

    Hi Dina,

    I think you make a valid point and I really appreciate you calling out these men. I just wanted to add one point; muslim youth and muslims in general have begun to only care about the practicalities in Islam but many of them lack the spirituality and understanding of it. We are merciless at pointing at each others flaws but we forget our lord is the most merciful. Shall we not then try to be more like him? Rather than the exterior we should all concentrate on the interior. My grandparents generation only knew the basics of Islam but they were much more spiritually fulfilled. Today we have more knowledge but can we say we have a deep spiritual connection with god?

    Just some food for thought.

  80. Hasna

    October 19, 2017 9:29 am

    Your message is not any better than the message of those men you are obviously referring to.
    How you wear a piece of fabric is your choice, but its not the hijab that Allah commanded the believing women to cover themselves with. Giving that impression, saying you are holding on to the little piece on your head because of Allah, is sending a wrong message. Because of your platform and the fact you chose to speak about it in public basically means every Muslim is entitled to speak up against it.

    Although some of the men (who you seem to refer to) were very polite in their video, you are straight out rude because you can’t handle the truth and think that despite your position and public sinning, can’t be called out by anyone (or other than those close to you). But I have to give it to you, they certainly aren’t knowledgeable enough, but neither are you:

    “Al Qurtubi said, “You are the best of peoples only if you enjoin good and forbid evil.”

    There should always be a group calling people towards good and forbidding them from evil. This is an obligation upon the Ummah which is a collective responsibility.

  81. ann

    October 19, 2017 2:27 pm

    Sad to see Muslims agree with what goes against Quran and sunnah.

  82. z

    October 19, 2017 8:54 pm

    Honestly far by thing I’ve read in a long time! Couldn’t have said it better! Thank you for addressing this issue. In society this often gets brushed aside & ignored and it’s so good to be able to see some one talk about it.

  83. Nvjibv

    October 20, 2017 11:13 am

    Nothing but facts, that have been mentioned.

  84. Hajjy

    October 20, 2017 10:21 pm

    Thank youuu for addressing this ! Seriously, I don’t understand why non-mahram men can feel so entitled about how a woman is dressing, like lower your gaze bruv.

  85. Layla

    October 21, 2017 1:02 am

    I agree. Especially the YouTube sheikhs who seem to want to title their videos with Muslim women’s WHOLE NAMES public ally for everyone to watch as their giving advice as if their not doing anything wrong . First of all their causing so much fitnah because while they say they love you for the sake of Allah and throw in the one two compliments it doesn’t shake that the first thing people are going to think when they see that video is ” this person is bad” “this person is haram” it’s just a way of exposing and Allah swt says that whoever exposed a brother or siste he will expose them on the day of judgement . If they wanted to drop Islamic advice for their viewers that’s fine MASHALLAH but generalize it pinpointing one individual with their name and face plastered on your video is so wrong on so many levels. I don’t mind generalized advice where it’s not pinpointing an individual but speaking the words of Allah and having people themselves reflect on their own actions. There is a wrong way to give advice and a good way but we shouldn’t reject the positive advice that is something we all need to hear.

    • s

      October 21, 2017 8:59 pm

      expose? a public figure?

  86. Reihana

    October 21, 2017 10:29 am

    YASSS PREACH this is a massive issue in today’s society and finally someone has addressed it 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  87. Meissa

    October 21, 2017 8:30 pm

    YYYASS DINA

  88. s

    October 21, 2017 8:56 pm

    Dear Dina,
    I actually enjoyed watching your vids, as they’re really funny and entertaining, but this has put me right off. What you’ve claimed is unoriginal and sadly typical of what’s seen on the anti-Islamic media’s stereotypical portrayal of religious Muslim men. To be honest, I’d appreciate it if you were honest and said:

    ‘Heya, GUYS! I am not an authority on Muslim dress and mannerism, so don’t follow my every move and think it’s ‘Islamic’, also these Muslim fellas who say I’m not wearing correct Hijab, get on my nerves but they may have a point, I don’t know and don’t care so, read up on the correct Hijab and choose for yourself.’

    However, to belittle them and condense them all to a ‘HUGH’ number of perverted idiots with insincere motives and little, to no Islamic knowledge, is dismissive and childish.
    The religion is ‘neesah’ or advice. So, as far as the western world is concerned, everyone can do and say as they see fit, which, of course, is acceptable to an extent. When we look at the Islamic tradition however, the religion is to be protected and there are limits. Therefore, when one is clearly Muslim and a public figure they are influential, voluntarily or involuntarily. So, if it happens that one engages in what may be perceived as ‘un-Islamic’ behaviour or dress, why would they not expect to be called out on it? Unless, you believe you are completely Islamic, and I understand there are varying opinions on what that looks like, but do you, personally see yourself as Islamically correct regarding dress and behaviour. If so, then I can see your issue, if not… then what do you expect?
    I think your article is very generalist and basic. I do not see an issue with Muslims advising one another and others, of a certain individual if there is fear that people will associate them with what is Islamically correct, in a dignified and respectful manner of course.
    The other problem you face is where is the boundary on when to say something and when to not ‘police’ others. Image this, and I am not equating this to you, Dina: A loveable, funny, Muslim Youtuber in an openly haram relationship, who eats non-halal meat and does bikini reviews. Ask yourself how you would feel about a ‘HUGH amount’ of Muslim men speaking out about her un-Islamic behaviour. I am sure a few more people who agree with you now, would have no problem with critics of this imaginary Youtuber.

    Lastly, I am sure you get sexist men sending abuse to you and I, as a women especially, do not condone that, but I am sure that not all who disagree with your views and lifestyle are perverted ignorant fools.

    Take care.

  89. s

    October 21, 2017 9:18 pm

    so….my comment go deleted? anyway as long as you read it first. Please at least change the title from ‘Muslim Men’ as it reinforces negative stereotypes.

  90. Saadat

    October 22, 2017 11:11 am

    Unfortunately I’m going to have to agree with you here, there seems to be a lot of very self righteous men in our society who feels it’s their responsibility to point out flaws in others, other Muslim women, who they’re not related to nor have any other form of connection to. This self entitlement to be able to judge us so freely and harshly is just… ridiculous but yet so common.
    I will never forget walking through a market and stopping at an Islamic stall, it was ramadhan, I was fasting, I don’t wear hijab. Before I could even purchase anything the stall owner started questioning me, are you Muslim? He asked, I told him I was. It was after this that his abusive words broke me down, I was stood there crying, whilst he continued to tell he how low my imaan, he told my friend that if if they continued to be in my company I would drag them down to my level… all this from a so called religious brother who was in Islamic clothing, had a long beard and prorated himself as nothing but righteous. I was 15 at the time. I had to run and hide behind a stall until I’d calmed down. Words hurt. They stay with us like scars sometimes.

  91. Elif

    October 22, 2017 2:49 pm

    Love the honesty! Unwarranted advice usually comes from people who have enough dirt under their nails, trying to save you from the “flames of jahannam”, as they like to say. Lowering the gaze goes for both sexes, should be taught more openly.

  92. Noor

    October 23, 2017 3:40 am

    How about people learn to mind their facking business. The end. The world is at peace.

  93. Amr

    October 23, 2017 11:55 am

    Hello Dina,

    First of all i understand your feelings towards such incident, and your frustration as a result of these comments towards what you are doing.

    what made me to comment on this post after few days of you writing it is to show that there are muslim men standing by your side, open minded and understanding the trend and the era we are living as long as it doesn’t come against the teaching or principles of our religion.

    Second is i want to highlight that on your post your wrote Muslim men on generally speaking addressing all muslim men, but all i want to say is not all muslim men are like that, believe me world is changing and you must be aware of that yet we are all suffering from minority of sick minded people.

    Third, i am a follower on your instagram account and i didn’t see any violation or anything that you did towards posting of any haram stuff, and i believe that your husband will be the first one accounted to guide you or direct you towards the right thing if you did any other.

    Fourth, you are who you are, you are a successful woman, and that comes with being exposed to so many number of people as you said, that doesn’t come free, the package comes with some hate, envy, and people that will always attack you, my say is to move on, don’t even pay attention, that would be a hard lesson for those who hate you, and it show them that they are nothing through your journey.

    Fifth, i want you to remember our Prophet Muhammad PBUH, how many muslims are there today ? how did he suffer till his messages came through to this number of muslims today ? it wasn’t easy for him to let people know what islam is and it wasn’t an easy journey for him, yet today there at least few muslims are living in all countries around the world.

    Keep going on your journey and what you are doing, don’t look towards the minority, don’t pay attention to all details, the more you are successful the more you will be hated, envied from some.

    Best of luck,
    and Again, not all Muslims are like that 🙂

  94. Layla

    October 25, 2017 6:56 am

    Dear Dina

    While I understand your concern regarding these uneducated men who pose as online Shaykhs I equally have concerns about female “hijabi bloggers “ who don’t represent hijab anymore , so I put you all in the same basket !
    Why?

    1. You only have all these followers because they think you’re a Muslim female representing them , but your dress and behaviour says otherwise
    2. You never seem to use your large followers to promote to Islam and spirituality , like for example doing videos about having “sabr” in dealing with criticism:) or just when they’re having hard time to turn to Allah , I noticed Habiba da Silva and few others , islam is the structure to ourlives without it what are we , I don’t understand how u fail to mention these things

    3. You’re in a scary position , 1 million people may negatively do something you have promoted and that sin will be added to your scale , ie changing hijab for turban 😵 , that will go on your scale on the day of judgement

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  96. Sabina

    October 26, 2017 11:33 pm

    I love this. Seriously this is exactly how I feel when watching some Muslim male youtubers, and I never comment because I just think, if I do comment it’ll have to be something positive. No I cannot comment anything positive because of the fact they’re humiliating young Muslim women on YouTube, giving all that talk about staying halal but then again they’ve taken the time to watch Muslim women on YouTube and then analyse their dress, their face, hair etc. I seriously think it’s ridiculous and enough is enough.
    Pft about giving dawah.

  97. Aqeelah

    October 27, 2017 12:31 am

    Finally!!! I’ve struggled to find the words to say this and you’ve done it for me!! For all of us. Thank You!!!!

  98. Farhat Parveen

    October 31, 2017 4:19 pm

    I love this post, absolutely correct, you go girl Dina, I love your blog and your rants and rightly so, everything you have mentioned in this post is correct unfortunately we live a a world where Muslim Men have a god given right to voice their opinion to any random women rather then focusing on their own sad lives. Anyway dont get me started but love your rants xxx

  99. kafi

    November 6, 2017 11:05 pm

    Yh, its very common for Muslim men to call out women for their hijab, while they themselves do not follow the rules of modesty. It is often the same men calling women ‘haram’ for showing strands of hair that are watching porn at home. Yes, many Muslim women may not have great hijab or modesty, but the sense of entitlement that some men feel is completely unfounded considering how hypocritical they often are themselves. These men backbite and degrade Muslim women in their schools and communities that they have no relation with, while completely ignoring the modesty of the eyes. These are the men that get (rightfully) offended when any other non-Mehram Muslim says a negative word about their mother or sister, yet are perpetrators of the same crime towards someone else’s mother or sister. There are of course issues with female Muslims too, but I think there really is a sense of delusion and ignorance when it comes to Muslim men. Many are either unaware or unwilling to accept their hypocrisy and their flaws.

    This is largely due to the treatment of men and women in the Muslim community. Note I say Muslim community, and not in Islam, because Islam teaches nothing but respect for both genders. However, many Muslim communities misinterpret Islamic teachings and raise boys to have the sort of superiority complex that creates a society with many delusional, arrogant and frankly disgusting Muslim men.

  100. Chelsana

    January 25, 2018 8:12 pm

    Absolutely love this post! Super empowering and applies to many cultures even beyond Islam. Keep being amazing !!! Xoxo

  101. Meriem

    January 25, 2018 10:27 pm

    Salam aleikom.

    This is sooo useful! I liked the message of your text and I sincerely hope that those young girls who follow tou will be able to read that, understand it and follow it while growing. Sometimes it’s a must to listen/read something similar since our community can have some unfair sides because of how people use the “power” they have and the way they spread it instead of doing things correctly to show the real, beautiful and kind face of our religion, which is a gift from Allah subhanu wa taala. We are so far from being the perfect muslim but helping each other, men and women, can absolutely make the difference instead of fighting and judging the others by small things as clothes, etc. We are nothing, we have not the right to judge the others, we have the power to help, give love and do great things for us and for islam, this is what qe are supposed to do. Live your life and let the others live.

  102. Zakkiya1

    January 26, 2018 2:24 am

    Well said. Women’s empowerment or women having their own say is what men need to get used to ,especially Muslim men in general!
    Thanks Dina
    You’re amazing

  103. Tayfun saral

    January 26, 2018 7:42 am

    So i read most of the comments aswell.
    Ok so no muslim men should not just go out commenting about how someoke dresses badly. Rather in islam we are thought to first talk in a gentle way, and see the good in someone before rushing in to bash them from every small thing they do. But to say that they do it to stay more in power or something along those lines is, i would say mostly wrong. Most of us men probably don’t even think about it that much about how are we gonna empower ourself and keep women at bay. Like no. We dont think things like that at all. I am a fan of yours i watch your videos and i enjoy them and i like what you are doing. And to the muslim men that comment on the way they dress for no reason, firstly, go pray your 5 salah. Secondly, what are you even here for, if you dont like things about her then just leave. If you do like some things about her or about her comment, then comment about that. Or indeed as dina said. Why dont you go to her husband to tell her that😂 oh and btw men. We should respect women atleast as much as other men. And know that because of your comments women will think bad of you. So do yourself a favour and dont comment like that again.

  104. Anon

    January 26, 2018 10:33 am

    The problem is, it’s women thinking this about other women that gives men the goddamn right to think this to. Education starts at home and lost of these muslim men are gown up thinking this by the women on their lives. You’re absolutely right in saying we need to educate the future generation – but our generation needs to break the cycle.

  105. zarif moda

    February 4, 2018 8:53 am

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  106. Kamal

    May 23, 2018 6:55 am

    I’m a non-Muslim but someone who keeps their legs covered and doesn’t reveal too much neckline – probably not a ‘modest dresser’ in that I wear short sleeves sometimes and leave hair uncovered, but I choose not to put too much ‘on display’.

    I find it baffling when I see a woman in hijab made up to the nines – if the point of modest dressing is to avoid attracting attention from members of the opposite sex then surely it doesn’t make sense to use a hijab as a fashion accessory?? But really it isn’t anyone else’s business what she uses it for.

    A woman should be able to wear whatever she wants without anyone else questioning whether or not she is sincere in her religious faith or whether or not she’s doing ‘modest dressing’ the way they think it should be done. It’s up to each individual to decide whether or not they have a faith, and if they do, to practise that faith in the way that seems right to them. So, those men who are finding it necessary to express an opinion on a woman who is not their wife or their daughter or whatever…….maybe they should instead be taking less or no interest in her appearance and minding their own business?

  107. Yvette

    June 1, 2018 9:48 am

    I’m not Muslim and I’m not a modest dresser but I COMPLETELY understand what you mean. That ‘god-like’ complex as if their opinion on anything is 1. needed, 2. valid, true in some way? 3. important is just … I have no patience for guys like that. And I’ve argued with people like them, the most infuriating part is a lot of them honestly don’t believe you don’t care for their opinion. They think you’re lying when you say you don’t. Who do you think you are, mate? You’re some random Mr. Average at best, who made you king of ‘I KNOW WHAT WOMEN WANT/ARE LIKE/DO’. Go sit in the corner.

  108. Lisa R.

    June 11, 2018 10:25 am

    I’m not muslim and still, reading this, makes me feel empowered and the sense of empowered towards other women in these words amazes me. This is what women should do for each other. And eventually bring all people of all genders, religions and backgrounds together to do just that for each other.
    *applauded

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  112. Gulshan

    November 10, 2018 12:04 pm

    What kind of free ass hater who is sitting around all day and looking to enforce his opinion online to women? Wow no ladies in your life huh?
    Anyways Dino, sending you some love… Don’t waste your energy on this men. They are hopeless…
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  121. Shay

    November 30, 2018 12:56 pm

    I love this so much, it really isn’t the attitude of a practicing Muslim man and I would avoid them at all costs for friendships/a future

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    November 30, 2018 2:44 pm

    Your position and your ability to stand your ground in this storm is very admirable and inspiring. Thank you, Dina. Truly and wholeheartedly, thank you.

  123. Sarah

    November 30, 2018 5:04 pm

    This is true, But I feel like we need to be open to the advice of the sincere people and not be closed off from the get go. I’m guilty of this too but our ego makes us get defensive and feel we are right when sometimes what the person is saying is actually sincere and it is right.

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